The 3 Keys To Setting Goals You’re Not Doing
I really have a hard time setting goals sometimes. The reason goal setting is so difficult for me is that I feel like I can get away without it and still achieve the results I am looking for. I guess you could say I get a little cocky.
But you can’t achieve your goals if you don’t properly set and execute them. Although the three steps I share below aren’t rocket science they can make all the difference between success and failure. Implement them and your likelihood of achieving your goals is nearly guaranteed.
Goals—everyone knows they should be setting them but rarely do. The reason is that so many people don’t know how to properly set them. It’s natural to expect that something won’t get done if we don’t know how to do it.
This isn’t another SMART goal how-to article—there are plenty of those online.
No, this is a fresh look and an invitation to work a process more effective than others you may already know.
Without further delay, here are The 3 Keys To Setting Goals You’re (Probably) Not Doing:
Key 1- Public Declaration
Mary Morrissey shares that the results of a study by Dr. Gail Matthews show:
“…you become 42% more likely to achieve your goals and dreams, simply by writing them down on a regular basis.”
But you already know you need to write down your goals.
I think where you will find the success rate for your goal completion skyrocket over-and-above writing them down is when you begin to share them with other people. Although there is plenty of advice online against sharing your goals, I still believe there are three main reasons why this key is so powerful.
The first is the power of accountability.
Public declaration cements your commitment like nothing else can.
I’ve heard it said before that we put more effort into those things that are inspected. When other people know our intention they are going to be watching. That is sometimes all the motivation we need to not fail.
But if nobody knows, except that scrap of paper we wrote our goal down on, then we lose that incentive. Can you see how much more powerful this strategy can be?
When we are accountable to someone we preserve a fear of consequence. The consequences may not actually be that high, but we are human after all—no one said we are completely rational.
Just having some level of accountability, real or imagined, will keep us pushing forward and on-track to reach our goals.
Dragos Roua summarizes accountability this way:
“Accountability is a measure of your ‘stick-to-it-ness’… So, if you bring other people in your goal picture, you can bet that your overall involvement in that project will be considerably higher.”
Your accountability doesn’t have to be broadcast to everyone. Just one trusted person will suffice. In fact, I would recommend not sharing your goal with everyone. Further down in this section I even list some options for anonymous accountability.
The second power is spiritual in concept.
When you share your goals with another human being you open yourself up.
Anytime we open ourselves up I believe we begin to engage the spiritual. Here’s why: spirituality is about shedding limits and experiencing connection. There are all manner of ways this can be seen:
– Beliefs about myself.
– Beliefs about God.
– Beliefs about what is possible.
In all of those examples, a new level of power is introduced in your life when you break through the walls you assume regarding them. You become more accepting, more connected, more empowered.
But if we remain closed-off we keep the walls in place that deny us that acceptance, connection, and empowerment.
All the things we do to protect ourselves and our ideas are carnal or, in other words, not spiritual. These are things like pride, fear, or selfish greed. Every time we engage in these things we wall-off the powerful spiritual forces that might otherwise help us.
However, as we go from closed to open we can experience those forces.
Imagine this process of opening or closing yourself in your head. In closure mode you ball up like an armadillo. Nothing can get in, nothing can get out. There is only one purpose and that is protection. Nothing else happens and no one else benefits.
Now think of yourself opening, like the bud of a beautiful flower blossoming in the sunlight. It loosens its grip on itself and turns and faces the sun welcoming every ray of light. The sun nourishes the flower and it lives its most powerful life, supplying the needs of the ecosystem around it and doing so in the most beautiful way.
Related: Open Things (Flowers)
As you open yourself through the process of public declaration, you switch yourself to the more powerful open mode. You allow unseen power to begin to flow where there was once only resistance.
The third reason is that there is power in the spoken word.
Ok, this goes back to the concept of the written word that I spoke about earlier. I certainly wasn’t denying the power of writing your goals down—it’s just that it’s pretty common knowledge by now.
But speaking your words aloud punctuates your intention to create, or manifest, your goal.
Biblically speaking, God created all that we see through the spoken word. Of course, we all know the oft-repeated phrase of Genesis chapter 1: “And God said…”
He spoke the world, the heavens above, the animals, even mankind into existence.
John 1:1-3 (NIV) shares something really interesting in actually calling this Creator THE Word:
“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.”
What impact does this knowledge have for us mere mortals?
God has given the answer right in the creation chapter, Genesis 1:27 (NIV):
“So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”
We don’t have the knowledge and power of God by any means yet we have His DNA. There are things about us that are like God. And if God is the Creator that means we are meant to create as well. If God created by His word, I believe we do also.
There is power in your words, my friends.
All of those negative limiting things we tell ourselves—those are words. When we say, “I can’t” that’s exactly what we achieve.
But when we set our intention and say, “I will!” then we do.
This isn’t a hesitant statement that you need to make. You need to get your conviction behind it.
Take that goal of yours and begin to speak it into existence. Speak in the quiet of your mind, speak it into the air, speak it to others. As you do you will unleash the spiritual power of creation.
So how do you publically declare your intent?
Here are a few simple suggestions for getting the word out about your next goal.
First, try social media.
People share their status updates all the time. Your friends or the anonymous people who follow you expect you to share what’s on your mind. Social media can be a place to share those goals that aren’t of a too sensitive nature.
What’s great about social media is that you can take your time to craft your words in just the right away. You can sleep on your words overnight to make sure you are not sharing too little or too much. It gives you time to figure out that balance.
One point of encouragement here: you don’t have to bare your soul or share all the dirty details of some hidden motivation behind them. Only give what information that you need to give, that you are embarking on a journey to achieve such-and-such. Remember, nobody even asked you! It’s enough to simply state that you have a goal you are working on and if they want to know more they will ask you.
Share with close friends or family.
Again, it doesn’t have to be a huge announcement. But what are friends or family for but to help each other? They will be excited that you are breaking out of a comfort zone and will enjoy the fact that you trust them enough to include them in the process.
The nice thing about this resource is that you can be a little more intimate in the details if you feel the need to. You will be able to communicate your motives along with your fears and hesitations. At this point, sharing your goals almost becomes a type of counsel, where you can get some encouragement, direction, or even assistance.
Try accountability software.
There are a number of free or low-priced apps that will help you share your goals and hold you to them. Here are a few that I’ve heard good things about:
Goals On Track
Toted as “Goal Software For High Achievers,” Goals On Track has a number of features to help you meet your targets.
First, it allows you to use the SMART system of goal setting to make sure your goals are met.
You can build action plans to manage the process with subgoals and milestones. There is a built-in ability to set specific action steps.
The software allows you the ability to track your progress on developing supporting habits. It allows you to track these habits for as little or as long as you want.
Here’s a cool feature: the ability to upload photos so you can create your own virtual vision board. If you believe the power of visualization, the process has never been easier.
You’re given a journal to record accomplishments or any encouraging thoughts.
And Goals On Track comes with templates to make your goal setting easier.
Lifetick
This service seems especially geared toward community involvement in achieving goals. The key features listed on their website are:
– “Start by establishing your core values in life. What is important to you?”
– “Follow the S.M.A.R.T. methodology to keep you on track”
– “Write about your experiences in your own journal”
– “Track any area of your life to develop the right habits for success”
– “Capture dreams that one day can become reality”
– “Chart your progress too see your achievements over time”
All-in-all it looks like a good solution in my opinion.
Stickk
What intrigues me so much about Stickk is their concept of Commitment Contracts with real stakes such as losing money if you don’t meet your goal.
You can even make a commitment to donate to a charity that you DO NOT want to support if you fail to reach your goal. Imagine how much would get done if opposing political parties had to support each other if they do not meet their goals!
According to their website:
“…our data shows that creating a Commitment Contract with:
– A Referee increases your chances of success by up to 2x
– Financial stakes increase your chances of success by up to 3x
What will it take you?”
So, what will it take you?
Key 2- Omission/Commission
Goals are ultimately about action & sacrifice. We have to not only DO things to achieve them but we also have to STOP DOING things that prevent us from reaching our goals.
Here’s how to plan for this in practical terms: List your goal then name one act of omission and one act of commission that will help you get there.
For example, if your goal is to lose 10 pounds in the next 30 days, two of your Omission/Commission steps might be:
Omission- Stop baking cookies each night to eat while plopping down on the couch and watching favorite Hallmark movies and…
Commission- Get up and walk an hour every evening or put together a simple exercise routine instead.
See how easy that is? It actually sounds like a really duh-moment but the thing is, most people fail to implement even a simple system like this to help them achieve their goals. They leave it all to chance. But without a deliberate system, our goals tend to fizzle right before our eyes. This method is simple and effective and will keep you on track.
Let’s say you have a financial goal to save $5,000 in the next six months so you can take your family on a nice vacation. You might have an Omission/Commission plan that looks something like:
O- Stop buying a latte five times a week.
O- Stop driving to work and try transit or a carpool in its place.
O- Stop taking unpaid time off of work to partake in your favorite hobby.
C- Save $200 of every paycheck in a dedicated account or withdraw it as cash and sock it away in a safe.
C- Pick up a side job or work extra hours.
C- Organize a garage sale or offer items in a virtual marketplace or classifieds service.
Just by detailing out a simple action plan like this you begin to empower yourself to succeed.
Here’s one more—a goal to bump that Spanish grade from a D to a solid B+. You could come up with a plan like this:
O- Stop playing video games five hours a night.
O- Stop waiting until the day homework is due to rush through it.
O- Stop catching ESPN updates during class.
C- Make sure to get eight hours of sleep every night.
C- Take all the extra credit options as possible.
C- Study one hour every weeknight.
I’ve also heard of this technique as Put On-Put Off. No matter what you call it, it has the power to help you reach your goals. Use it as a method to clarify what you need to actively do as well as stop doing to get there.
Key 3- Rewards And Punishments
Now this one you have to be a little more careful with. If your goal is something along the lines of improving your health your reward probably shouldn’t be to smoke a cigarette. But, barring decisions like that rewards can be one of the best motivators for reaching your goals.
Rewards trigger Dopamine, also known as “The Reward Molecule” or the “feel-good hormone.”
Rewards are inherently pleasurable, that is if they are chosen correctly. Presumably, we’ve experienced the emotional benefits at some time or times in the past of the particular reward we are currently setting. When that reward was experienced previously there would have been a release of Dopamine which essentially “cements” our attraction to that reward.
If we have had a really enjoyable experience walking a sandy beach, for instance, as we contemplate the promise that we might be able to experience it again, our bodies crave the hit of Dopamine it remembers and seeks to recreate the events to release it.
But Avelist’s Mickey Gast shares that you shouldn’t just reward yourself at goal completion:
“Instead of only rewarding ourselves at the end of a task, the trick is to also reward our progress along the way. This way, we shift focus from rewarding the final product to rewarding the performance itself. Through combining effort and rewards we can learn to associate work with something desirable.” (emphasis mine)
Try creating an enjoyable experience all through the process of goal attainment. If it’s rewarding only at the end there are plenty of places along the way where we can lose focus or even hope. By making the process more enjoyable you increase your chances of actually getting to the end.
A reward is a promise of something desirable, something that will release that feel-good feeling. As we humans tend to avoid pain and seek pleasure rewards make an effective motivator.
But there is also a growing movement into the benefits of punishment as well.
Issie Lapowsky shares in her article for Inc.com:
“In a study of 150 public-school teachers in Chicago Heights, Illinois, University of Chicago economist John List split the teachers into two groups and told both that their bonuses would be linked to student test scores. Teachers in the first would receive a bonus at the end of the year if student test scores improved. Members of the second group received a check for $4,000 in September and agreed to return the money if test scores failed to rise by June. Loss aversion worked: Teachers who faced the threat of having to refund their bonuses produced student test scores that were about 7 percentage points higher on average than the scores of students with teachers in the conventional bonus plan.”
It’s clear that the concept of loss aversion is also effective.
So how do you choose which method to use? I think it’s a matter of whatever motivates you more. You are going to have to experiment with a little of each and maybe at the same time. There’s no rule that says you can’t set a reward and punishment for the same goal.
The point is to do something. Implementing just about any strategy will work better than just winging it which is what I would guess 95% of people do.
Rewards and punishments are another one of those strategies that seems so obvious. But are you using them? They are techniques that are easy to dismiss unless you try them.
Take Away
Goals are the milestones on our journey of success. But each goal is also made of many steps. Strategies like the ones in this article will help you make sure those steps keep moving forward and on-track.
The key to implementing anything new is to begin immediately, however. Don’t wait to try to do this exercise. Do it right away before your mind tries to rationalize it away.
If you haven’t yet, begin by writing your goal down. Then work it out against the SMART test. These are the real basics and you should, of course, start here.
But after that, work through these three keys to setting goals. Brainstorm your responses down in a journal.
Determine who and how to publicly declare your goal. Write out some Omission/Commission steps that you can take to help ensure your success. And then clinch the deal by setting some appropriate rewards or punishments to motivate results.
My guess is that you haven’t been consistently working strategies such as this. As you do I’m confident you will be well on your way to achieving your goals.
Which strategies are you going to use to achieve your goals?
Aaron Force is a blogger from Seattle, Washington. He writes from a point of authenticity, as an outpouring of a spiritual calling and awakening that occurred in April of 2015. His purpose is to help better the lives of his readers with instruction, insight, and inspiration related to spirituality and self-improvement. The story of his remarkable calling can be found (here).
Aaron Force is a blogger from Seattle, Washington. He writes to educate others about the nature of an expanded consciousness to evolve humanity. Aaron unexpectedly experienced his own profound awakening and ego transcendence in 2015 and soon understood that the qualities of his own experience (a greater expansion and evolution in his life) could be applied to mankind collectively.